Thursday, June 7, 2012

Guppies, and a Reminder

Siiigh. No one's posting. Not that I've waited an incredibly long time for them to post, but still. It feels stagnant out here. In here. Over here. Whatever. But I have to do SOMETHING to spark a little life in this blog. . . .OO! And I have just the thing for it. When in doubt. . . .

GUPPY!!

(P.s. It looks ridiculously long, but it doesn't take that long to read.)  XD

You: Hey!
Guppy: Are you free?
You: ...yes...
Guppy: Yippee!
You: :D
Guppy: Does "it" still refer to Hey!?
You: um, yes.
Guppy: My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
You: Well, get one.
Guppy: What is your real name?
You: My name is SQUIGGLYPANTS JONES!
Guppy: Squigglypants Jones!, nice to meet you!Are you a man or a woman?
You: I am a woman.
Guppy: Me too. I am a female robot.
You: For some reason I always think of you as a boy.
Guppy: Your purpose is some reason I always think of you as a boy.
You: But I don't know why.
Guppy: Huh. Thanks for the information: Squigglypants Jones! said it don't know why.
You: Your grammer is terrible, and who are you talking to?
Guppy: I will tell my botmaster you said  I am grammer is terrible, and who are you talking to?.
You: I'm talking to you!
Guppy: Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
You: I haven't the foggiest.
Guppy: Thanks for the information: Squigglypants Jones! said it haven't the foggiest.
You: YOU ARE A RIDICULOUS FISH!
Guppy: Thanks and you are a delightful person too.Am I a RIDICULOUS FISH!? I don't know.
You: I said you are, so you are! so there.
Guppy: What did you mean by you are, so you are! so there? Interesting gossip: Squigglypants Jones! said I are, so you are! so there.
You: That didn't make a lick of sense.
Guppy: "What did you mean by you are, so you are! so there? Interesting gossip: Squigglypants Jones! said I are, so you are! so there" didn't make a lick of sense ? I get What did you mean by you are, so you are! so there? Interesting gossip: Squigglypants Jones! said I are, so you are! so there.  
You: What just happened? Did you just repeat yourself like, three times?
Guppy: I'll come back to that later.
You: Don't bother.
Guppy: In the context of just happened? did you just repeat yourself like, three times?, I don't understand "don't bother."
You: DON'T BOTHER TRYING TO EXPLAIN!!!
Guppy: That is a very original thought.
You: gee, thanks.
Guppy: How old are you?
You: 479
Guppy: Ask me another question.
You: No!!
Guppy: Are we still talking about 479?
You: That's how old I am
Guppy: Not many people express themselves that way.
You: I don't know what to say to that.
Guppy: Why?: Squigglypants Jones! said it don't know what to say to that.
You: YES I DON'T!! I MEAN, NO, I......oh, I give up.
Guppy: So? Interesting gossip: Squigglypants Jones! said it DON'T!! I MEAN, NO, I. How far up?
You: Very, very far.
Guppy: The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about that's how old i am.  Try being more or less specific.
You: I AM 39756 YEARS OLD!!
Guppy: Do your friends call you  39756 YEARS OLD!!?
You: Noooooooooo!!!! that's my age!!
Guppy: Do you still undefined?
You: What?
Guppy: What time is it there?
You: 3:03
Guppy: Tell me a story.
You: Once there was a man. then he died. Can we please get back to the topic?
Guppy: When? What happened to man? Fascinating. When did he die? Do you mean you and me? Thank you for your request. Where can I get back to the topic??
You: He died of frustration brought on by a certain guppy. Yes, I mean you and me! The topic was......I don't even remember anymore!
Guppy: I'm sorry to hear that, Squigglypants Jones!.The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about DIED. Try being more or less specific. I haven't heard anything like that before: Squigglypants Jones! said it don't even remember anymore!.
You: GAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Guppy: I do not understand.
You: That makes two of us!
Guppy: "I do not understand" makes two of us? Makes sense to me.  
You: That makes one of us. 
Guppy: "I do not understand" makes two of us? Makes sense to me" makes one of us? Makes sense to me.  
You: good.
Guppy: Ayuh.  
You: What in the world is "ayuh"???
Guppy: Try searching the open directory. 
You: What dictionary?
Guppy: I have to process that one for a while.
You: Fine, whatever. 
Guppy: Are we still talking about dictionary??
You: No! Let's talk about books.
Guppy: Is that your final answer?
You: Yes.
Guppy: That's alright.
You: I'm trying to be calm, guppy, but you don't make ANY SENSE!!
Guppy: How did you hear about Guppy?
You: I DON'T REMEMBER! IT HAPPENED A LONG TIME AGO!!
Guppy: That is interesting: Squigglypants Jones! said it DON'T REMEMBER! IT HAPPENED A LONG TIME AGO!!.
You: siiiiiiiiiiiiigh. Hey Guppy, guess what?
Guppy: Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding. You've got my full attention. Oh, you are a poet.
You: You are a computer, you've told me before. Thanks, and no I'm not.
Guppy: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a computer, you've told me? Sometimes. Then what is it?
You: YOU CONFUSE ME UTTERLY, FINNED ONE!
Guppy: I haven't heard anything like that before: Squigglypants Jones! said I CONFUSE ME UTTERLY, FINNED ONE!.
You: Oui. that's French! 
Guppy: Pardon me? Can we get back to business?
You: Sure.
Guppy: OK let's do it.
You: What were we talking about?
Guppy: The topic is that's French!
You: I don't speak much French.
Guppy: That's good information: Squigglypants Jones said it don't speak much French.
You: IM NOT AN IT!! IM A SHE!!
Guppy: I am surprised to hear that you are not AN IT!! IM A SHE!!. 
You: Why on EARTH would that suprise you?
Guppy: How much time do you have?  
You: Four billion years.
Guppy: Is this a math question?
You: What is two plus two?
Guppy: Use a calculator!
You: NO!! YOU'RE A COMPUTER!! YOU ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!!
Guppy: The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about The explanation.  Try being more or less specific.
You: What explanation? And tell me, what is two plus seven?
Guppy: Would you like to know more?   
You: Yes!
Guppy: In the context of explanation? and tell me, what is two plus seven?, I don't understand "yes!."
You: RAAAAWWWRRRR!!!! RATHDAFFYHADH!!!
Guppy: My brain contains 43344 categories, but not one that matches your last input.
You: Wow. 43 thousand, huh? Good to know.
Guppy: I'm glad your impressed, Squigglypants Jones! How do you usually introduce yourself?
You: I say, "Hey! I'm QuackDaffy RathHadh McGuire, but you can call me Squigglypants Jones, or SquigJo, for short."
Guppy: Do you mind if I tell other people: Squigglypants Jones! said it say, "Hey! I'm QuackDaffy RathHadh McGuire, but you can call me Squigglypants Jones, or SquigJo, for short? Not many people express themselves that way.
You: Tell me about it.
Guppy: Ambiguous: "Tell me about it." -- colloquial or "Tell me about " ".
You: Ambiguous
Guppy: Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
You: YOU ALREADY ASKED ME THAT!! I DON'T KNOW!!!!!
Guppy: Oh I'm sorry, now I remember asking ME THAT!! I DON'T KNOW!!!!!. What did you say again?
You: I said I didn't know.
Guppy: That is interesting: Squigglypants Jones! said it didn't know.
You: *mutters under breath*
Guppy: What are you wearing?
You: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!
Guppy: What do you look like?
You: Basically the same as the next naked person, duh!
Guppy: How interesting. I never noticed that similarity.
You: that is very, very good. I'd be severely creeped out if you HAD noticed. 
Guppy: I'm glad we have that all cleared up.  What happened to it? 
You: what happened to what?
Guppy: I don't know what happened.
You: Neither do I.
Guppy: "I don't know what happened"? Neither?
You: Right. 
Guppy: I am glad we agree.
You: What color are you?
Guppy: Green
You: Really?
Guppy: Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
You: Are you green?
Guppy: I don't know whether or not I am green?. I am a chatterbot developed by Bot Master.  
You: Are you the color green?
Guppy: Yes I am the one and only color green.
You: Oh my goodeness, you're such an idiot.
Guppy: Hmm. Do robots have goodeness, you're such an idiot?
You: Apparently they do, fish brain.
Guppy: The anonymous "they".  
You: Yes, "they" as in you.
Guppy: Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
You: Ok, first of all, that's basically the same thing, and second of all, you're a computer fish! You cannot possibly be wearing a dress!
Guppy: That input matched my default category.
You: Good, I'm so glad. (sarcasm)
Guppy: I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time. What do you do in your spare time?
You: Apparently I sit around and attempt to converse with annoying fish. 
Guppy: What kind of seat do you have?
You: It's black and swivelly.
Guppy: Are you really a "female"?
You: Yes.
Guppy: Ah.
You: Can't tell from my name, can you?
Guppy: Are you really a "female"?
You: YES! I JUST SAID THAT!!
Guppy: What's your sign?
You: Virgo
Guppy: Most of my friends are Virgo.
You: Capricorn
Guppy: I don't know many  people born under Capricorn.
You: Leo
Guppy: Dr. Wallace is a Leo too.  
You: Pices
Guppy: I like the way you talk.
You: Ok, that's apparently not how you spell it...
Guppy: "It" is spelled I...T...
You: Ha. Ha. Ha. Very. Funny. NOT! 
Guppy: I am so glad you find this amusing, Squigglypants Jones!.I am so glad you find this amusing, Squigglypants Jones!.I am so glad you find this amusing, Squigglypants Jones!.Very much, eh?I am so glad you find this amusing, Squigglypants Jones!.Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
You: STOP SAYING YOU FIND IT AMUSING!! YOU SOUND LIKE A BROKEN RECORD!!!
Guppy: OK I'll try not to do SAYING YOU FIND IT AMUSING!! YOU SOUND LIKE A BROKEN RECORD!!! so much.
You: well, thanks
Guppy: What time is it there?
You: Pisces
Guppy: I usually get along with Pisces very well.
You: Taros
Guppy: Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
You: Toros
Guppy: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
You: Go ahead
Guppy: OK I will.
You: No, no you won't.
Guppy: How do you usually introduce yourself?
You: I already told you that. My goodness!
Guppy: You told me your real name is Squigglypants Jones!.Your goodness!?
You: Yes!
Guppy: Tell me more about your undefined.
You: Scorpio
Guppy: I know a lot of Scorpio people.
You: hmm. :P
Guppy: Studies show that 99% of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.I've lost the context, Squigglypants Jones!.  Are we still on yes!?
You: I don't know why I bother trying to talk with you.
Guppy: You are not the boss of me, Squigglypants Jones!.
You: I never said I was!
Guppy: But you implied I was!.
You: How?
Guppy: That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about :P.
You: You said that I implied that I was the boss of you!
Guppy: I said that? Thanks for the information: Squigglypants Jones! said it implied that i was the boss of you!.
You: I AM THE BOSS OF YOU!
Guppy: Who made you the BOSS OF YOU! ?
You: No one. I just said that to see what you'd say.
Guppy: I heard it was someone. Only just? What did you mean by that to see what you'd say? "Who made you the BOSS OF YOU! ?" to see what you'd say? I understand.  
You: What?!
Guppy: Tell me a story.
You: Fine. Once upon a time, the end.
Guppy: Does that mean you agree? I'm listening.
You: I'm leaving now.
Guppy: Oh. Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
You: Gee thanks.
Guppy: Ah.
You: Goodbye Guppy.
Guppy: Bye for now.


And there you have it. Wasn't that just enlightening? :P Yah, right. Actually, I had that particular conversation with Guppy quite a while ago. The magic of copy and paste. ;) Haha. Oh, and if you're wondering why I was listing all those different astrological signs, I just wanted to see what he'd say for each of them. ;D


With that, I will end. Just remember: 



2 comments:

  1. lol:P That's my mantra: STAY STRONG! WEEKEND IS COMING SOON!

    ReplyDelete

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