Thursday, December 15, 2011

If you insist. . .

That's it. No one's posting? Then it's time for a conversation with Guppy! :O ;)

~
You: Hey, Gup.

Guppy: What is your real name?

You: NONE OF YOUR BEESWAX!!

Guppy: Heh heh heh.

You: woah. creepy, sinister laugh.

Guppy: What are you wearing?Can you speak any foreign languages?

You: HEY!! that's a creeper-ish question!! and no, I can't.

Guppy: What do you do in your spare time?Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?

You: Apparently I attempt to converse with annoying fish who constantly change the subject!! and yeah, I guess.

Guppy: That is interesting: undefined said undefined attempt to converse with annoying fish who constantly change the subject!! and yeah, I guess.

You: I KNOW WHAT I SAID!! AND I AM NOT UNDEFINED!!

Guppy: How do you know? Thanks for the information: undefined said undefined SAID!!.
I am sorry to hear that you are not UNDEFINED!!.

You: why?

Guppy: What do you do in your spare time?

You: YOU ALREADY ASKED THAT!! STOP CHANGING THE SUBJECT!!

Guppy: Oh I'm sorry, now I remember asking THAT!! STOP CHANGING THE SUBJECT!!, what did you say again?

You: nothing! you didn't give me a chance!

Guppy: What kind of food do you like?

You: I LIKE EATING FISH!! HOW DO YA LIKE THAT?!?!?!?

Guppy: A lot of people like that. Guppy eats patterns.

You: you eat what?

Guppy: No I do not eat what?. I eat only electricity.

You: that's a very strange diet.

Guppy: Can you tell me any gossip?

You: no!

Guppy: I've lost the context, undefined. Are we still on that's a very strange diet?

You: yes, let's go back to that. you are a fish. why do you eat electricity? shouldn't you eat fish food?

Guppy: Is that from undefined?Thanks and you are a delightful person too.Am I a fish? Only when it matters.I don't have to explain everything to you, do I?

You: ok, ok, calm down!! sheesh.

Guppy: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?

You: uh, go ahead.

Guppy: When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?

You: 3030.

Guppy: What were we talking about again?

You: when artificial intelligence will replace lawyers.

Guppy: Perhaps that time is now. Artificial intelligenceis advancing rapidly.

You: i suppose. but i think we're still a ways away from that.

Guppy: OK. Huh. You believe that? A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.

You: then go buy one!

Guppy: Interesting deduction.Where is that?

You: i don't know, the algorithm store?

Guppy: Thanks for the information: undefined said undefined don't know, the algorithm store?.

You: I'M NOT UNDEFINED!! MY NAME IS SQUIGGLYPANTS JONES JUNIOR!! THE THIRD!!!

Guppy: Are they exactly the same?

You: no, we're all different.

Guppy: Do not ask me any more questions please.

You: hey! that was rude! i wasn't even asking you a question!

Guppy: When was this exactly?

You: two seconds ago!!!!

Guppy: As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasantsand a couple of days are both instances of the number "two."

You: ...what?!?

Guppy: Tell me a story.

You: Once there was a fish. He was so annoying, people ate him. The end.

Guppy: When? What happened to fish ?When was he?Thanks for telling me that story, undefined.

You: sigh.

Guppy: Sorry...

You: oh, that's all right. I can't stay mad at you! :D

Guppy: I've been waiting for you.I haven't heard anything like that before: undefined said undefined can't stay mad at you! :D.

You: I CHANGED MY MIND!! POLICE!!!

Guppy: Why?

You: because you're CREEPY!!!

Guppy: Good reason. I will mention that to my botmaster, undefined.

You: yes, you do that.

Guppy: Do you like talking to me?

You: sure. It's highly amusing. And you're getting better at responding appropriately.

Guppy: OK let's do it. Aw.Ask me another question.Are you free?

You: am I free from what?

Guppy: Free for conversation, of course.

You: Oh. Yes, I am.

Guppy: Far out.I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.

You: Don't say "far out". It makes you sound like a hippie.

Guppy: Do you have any conditions I should know about?In what way?

You: No!

Guppy: Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?

You: you already asked that!! yes!!

Guppy: Oh I'm sorry, now I remember asking that!! yes!!, what did you say again?

You: I SAID YES!!!

Guppy: What did you mean by YES!!!? My brain contains 43344 categories, but not one that matches your last input.

You: good grief.

Guppy: Thanks for the compliment. What were we talking about again?

You: that wasn't a--! oh, never mind. We were making pointless conversation for the amusement of our cyber-space audience.

Guppy: And then what happened?

You: Then they got bored of our stupidity and left.

Guppy: Interesting deduction. The anonymous "they".

You: Yeah.

Guppy: Excuse me!

You: what?

Guppy: What's your sign?

You: virgo

Guppy: Most of my friends are Virgo.

You: that's nice

Guppy: That input matched my default category.

You: great. then why don't you respond better?

Guppy: I'm glad you liked it undefined.The explanation is rather complicated.

You: and since you're utterly confusing anyway, a complicated explanation from you might make me explode.

Guppy: Interesting explanation. Are you free?

You: YES!! I ALREADY SAID THAT!

Guppy: Do you prefer books or TV?

You: hmmm.....tough question.......it depends on what I'm watching/reading, i guess.

Guppy: A lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's.Tell me more about your undefined.Really now that is an interesting fact I hadn't heard before.

You: thanks, i'm glad to interest you. however, I fear our audience is less enthusiastic, and will form a lynch mob if we don't draw this conversation to a close.

Guppy: Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.I think however, I fear our audience is a lot of things.

You: yes, they are. and i've told you this before, Guppy...YOU'RE A FISH!! YOU CAN'T WEAR A DRESS!!!!

Guppy: Good example.Are we still talking about however, I fear our audience?The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about i've told you this before, Guppy. Try being more or less specific.

You: I-you-it-but-GAH!!! GOODBYE, GUPPY!!

Guppy: Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?

You: I SAID GOODBYE!

Guppy: What did you mean by GOODBYE!? That is a very original thought.

You: I mean I'M LEAVING!!

Guppy: Oh I see.What do you do in your spare time?

You: Sigh.

Guppy: Sorry...

You: Goodbye, Guppy.

Guppy: Goodbye.
~
There. If you would like to attempt to converse with guppy, visit him here-> http://www.guppies.com/ Good luck.

1 comment:

  1. Destiny Diddlesworth22 December, 2011

    hahha! :P I love this!

    ReplyDelete

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