Sunday, February 27, 2011

Beauty and the Beast

So, I recently aquired of one of Disney's classics, Beauty and the Beast (digitally remastered, of course! as well as with the song "we'll be human again." that song wasn't in the original version, but it's not like the people today just made it up and put it in. it's still from a long time ago. anyway...). I'm sure you've all seen it (the movie) at one point in your life, and if you haven't, well, you should. Not just Beauty and the Beast, but ALL the Disney classic cartoons, such as Aladdin, the Lion King, Peter Pan, the Little Mermaid, etc, etc, etc. Anywho! I thought I'd share with you a song that I find rather amusing. And, in case I've confused you, yes, this song is from Beauty and the Beast. ;) Idk the title of it, so I'll just call it the "Gaston Song." Gaston is the bad guy, btw.

Gaston Song:
-Gaston; "Who does she think she is? That girl has tangled with the wrong man! No one says 'no' to Gaston!"
-LeFou(his minion); "Darn right."
-G; "Dismissed! Rejected! Publicly humiliated! Why, it's more than I can bear!"
-L; "More beer?"
-G; "What for? Nothing helps. I'm disgraced."
-L; "Who, you? Never! Gaston, you've got to pull yourself together!"
-L; "Gosh, it disturbs me to see you, Gaston, looking so down in the dumps!
Every guy here'd love to be you, Gaston, even when taking your lumps.
There's no man in town as admired as you,
You're everyone's favorite guy!
Everyone's awed and inspired by you!
And it's not very hard to see why....
No one's slick as Gaston!
No one's quick as Gaston!
No one's neck's as incredible thick as Gaston's!
For there's no one in town half as manly,
Perfect, a pure paragon!
You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley,
And they'd tell you whose team they'd prefer to be on!"
-All; "No one's been like Gaston,
A king pin like Gaston!"
-L; "No one's got a swell cleft in his chin like Gaston!"
-G; "As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!"
-A; "My, what a guy, that Gaston!
Give 5 hurrahs! Give 12 hip hip's!"
-L; "Gaston is the best and the rest is all drips!"
-A; "No one fights like Gaston!
Douses lights like Gaston!"
-Random dude; "In a wrestling match nobody bites like Gaston!"
-Girls; "For there's no one as burly and brawny!"
-G; "As you see, I've got biceps to spare!"
-L; "Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny!"
-G; "That's right! And every last inch of me's covered with hair!"
-A; "No one hits like Gaston!
Matches wits like Gaston!"
-L; "In a spitting match nobody spits like Gaston!"
-G; "I'm especially good at expectorating!"
-A; "Ten points for Gaston!"
-G; "When I was a lad, I ate 4 dozen eggs every morning to help me get large!
And now that I'm grown, I eat 5 dozen eggs, so I'm roughly the size of a barge!"
-A; "No one shoots like Gaston!
Makes those beauts like Gaston!"
-L; "Then goes tromping around wearing boots like Gaston!"
-G; "I use antlers in all of my decorating!"
-A; "My what a guy! Gaston!"

(Belle's dad comes in, shouting about how the Beast has Belle locked in a dungeon, they throw him out)

-G; "LeFou, I'm afraid I've been thinking."
-L; "A dangerous pastime!"
-G; "I know.
But that wacky old coot is Belle's father, and his sanity's only so-so.
Now the wheels in my head have been turning
Since I looked at that looney old man.
See, I promised myself I'd be married to Belle,
And right now I'm evolving a plan!"
(Indistinct whispering)
-L; 'Now I get it!"
-L&G; "Let's go!"
-L&G; "No one plots like Gaston!"
-G; "Takes cheap shots like Gaston!"
-L; "Plans to persecute harmless crackpots like Gaston!"
-A; "For his marriage we soon will be celebrating!
My what a guy! Gaston!"

Haha! :D That's all I'm going to say, because this post is already wayyyy to long. Pickles!



  2. BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! and i think it's "is," but idk. :P ;)

  3. Destiny Diddlesworth01 March, 2011

    I think it is "is"! (; js.

  4. I watched that movie about 2 weeks ago. It's not just for girls (even though I was one of three guys in the room, and like ten + girls:P) good flick


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